I was looking back through my journal this morning and something from my reading in Acts started me thinking. This is from Saul’s journey to persecute Christians; how he joined them in faith. It was God calling him out, on the road to Damascus.
Acts 22:9 “Now those who were with me saw the light but did not understand the voice of the one who was speaking to me.”
My first thought is “Why?,” followed by many things attached to “Why?”
Why could those with him hear but not understand? Was it a heavenly language, if so, how did Saul understand? Did God confuse the minds of those with Saul so they couldn’t understand? Was it a language Saul knew but was beyond the experience of his companions?
This is just my own wondering, not a Biblical truth, but what if God’s message was too intimate for others? It excites me to think it might have been important to God that His communication be for Saul alone. It was okay for those with him to know a supernatural thing was happening, but the content was only for Saul.
After this mind blowing experience everything changed, even Saul’s name. Saul became Paul, the persecutor became the persecuted, the hater became the lover, the respected became the questioned, the one who tossed people into prison, eventually found himself in imprisoned, several times.
Everything Paul knew was tossed in the air and confused. He had to be mentored for years in order for God to move him into his new calling. Only Saul understood the voice but in time, family, friends, coworkers, and enemies alike knew something heavenly had happened. He was changed.
I desire that intimate communication from God, but it’s scary. There are unknown long term consequences. Do I have the courage to risk being changed? I pray for the passion to long for God’s calling more than control, and that’s almost too scary to put on the page.