To Grouch or Grace

Some days I wonder about me, the depth of me. Thursday night I heard a moving message from Anne Graham Lotz. When she spoke the word, “Jesus” her love for her Lord was tangible. I felt that deep, reverent love from across the room. My eyes filled with tears.

Then within hours my humanity was in full control. At 2:30am a group of people were speaking outside my hotel room as if it were noon and they were separated by a football field. Seriously? Did your Mama never teach you about a library voice? That’s the one you use in the library, church and hotel hallways, where just a few feet away someone may be trying to sleep.

In spite of my earplugs I was jarred awake. It happened all three nights, between 1 and 3 am. Apparently there are many people out there who know nothing about using a library voice as a courtesy to others. As tempted as I was I didn’t open the door to give them a scathing rebuke. I just told God what I thought of them. Aren’t you glad He doesn’t answer every prayer as we pray? I am.

Just a few hours after being deeply moved by speakers challenging me to read the word, to pray, to trust God even in my suffering, I was punching pillows, smacking the mattress, muttering unkind words and generally being a grouch.

How quickly I switch from spiritual to carnal.

I am praying today for a heart that is quick to grace and slow to grouch.”Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” Proverbs 16:24


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